The Cultural Gutter

dumpster diving of the brain

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -- Oscar Wilde

The corner goes at the front! You’re
not a pirate.

Public bar sign

So Winston Churchill, Emma Goldman, and Alexander Graham Bell walk into a bar… Murdoch Mysteries isn’t quite as over the top as that, but it’s still basically what you get. Substitute Benjamin Franklin, Betsy Ross, and Pandora and you’d have Sleepy Hollow, which actually is that over the top. They’re examples of the nearly endless […]

Perfectly Adequate dot com

Sweet tarts candy hearts

Falling in love is wonderful, right? You meet someone, feel sick to your stomach every time you talk to them and miserable whenever you’re apart. You care desperately what they think of you and can’t figure out what they think of you to save your life because you can’t actually think around them at all. […]

Reality is broken, let’s play games

Ingress portal thumb

Ask me whether I’d like x or y and the answer is frequently yes. Maybe it’s being a Libra, or growing up around my mother’s talent for creative problem solving, but when faced with a choice between two options one of the first things I ask myself is do I actually want to pick only […]

Some kind of help

Johnny 5

Robots. Sure, if we get it wrong they might take over the world and force us to serve them buffets of edible oil products and fancy electric cocktails, but they have the potential to be so cute and helpful. For every Terminator or I, Robot army that would hunt you down and crush you, there […]

Don’t forget the evil magic words

Army of Darkness Ash S-Mart

I often consider how the me of the future will feel about what I’m choosing to do right now, but more on the scale of “morning alex will be really annoyed that night alex didn’t bother to make a lunch” than on the scale of “how will I feel about this decision I’m making in […]

Time loops and the failures of memory

Old Grey House by Billy Jacobs

Memory is an unreliable narrator. It seems so absolutely sure of itself when it’s telling you things that it’s easy to forget it can’t wholly be trusted. There are always gaps and discrepancies, sections that get revised in light of subsequent events or reshaped to soften the sharpest edges. Our memories, like our brains and […]

A Short History of Hellmouths

Bourges Cathedral Medieval Last Judgement Hellmouth

Living just outside the gates of hell is a very convenient plot device. It handily solves the narrative challenge of providing a plausibly endless supply of demons and evil beasties for a protagonist to fight, and it’s not like hell ever goes away. Maybe you get lucky and manage to close the gate near you, […]

Not in my backyard

The Last Stand poster

“Not in my backyard” is a phrase that has acquired a bunch of negative connotations since it came into common usage in the 80s. NIMBYism usually means that there’s something you benefit from or rely on to maintain your lifestyle, but you don’t want anyone to build one near where you live. As in, “Please […]

Jurassic Park vs. Ghostbusters

Godzilla vs Stay Puft

The title is probably misleading. It makes this sound like one of those Grizzly vs Shark or Sperm Whale vs Giant Squid books that my son keeps pointing out in the Scholastic Book catalogues he brings home every month. Maybe you’re envisioning the Ghostbusters, all geared up with their old-school vacuum backpacks, facing off against a group […]

Maybe the Grendel just needs a hug

Grendel learning

Every April at the Gutter we mix things up with the editors writing something outside their usual domain. This week Screen Editor alex writes about video games. The last time I wrote about video games, I detailed my failures as a creator in the original Creatures artificial life computer game. I mocked myself for the […]

Later is when we have less time

Adele Blanc-Sec book

Impatience is a trait that can be irritating, both in other people and oneself, and often results in disaster. In one of my previous articles, Don’t Be That Guy, I used the term “incapacitatingly impatient” to describe all the crazy things people do because they can’t bring themselves to wait long enough to make a […]

It doesn’t matter, it’s in the past

Something nasty in the woodshed thumbnail

I’m not much for making New Year’s resolutions. The idea of a chance to reset the clock on things I keep meaning to do more consistently or successfully than I ever seem to manage is appealing, but it seems like a bit of a gimmick to me. It’s never really a clean slate because you […]

Don’t be That Guy

go back wrong way

If I ever write a self help book, I think I’m going to call it Don’t be That Guy. You know that guy? He’s the one who took two brownies even though everyone was asked to only take one and then there weren’t enough for everybody. He’s the guy who completely failed to notice you […]

Let’s not realize your dreams…

28 days later bad dream

For our anniversary, my wife and I got a really nice message from my family wishing us good things, including that we would “realize our dreams”. When I’d finished responding, I looked over at her and noticed she had a strange expression on her face. You might think that after I woke up to find […]

Deserve’s got nothing to do with it

Justified thumb

As soon as the old detective starts talking about buying a boat and all the fish he’s going to catch, or what the view will be like from his back window when he retires, you pretty much know he’s not gonna make it. Or maybe he will, but not without taking a bullet in the […]

High diving boards, banana costumes,
and other risks worth taking

Normal Rockwell Boy on High Dive

I come from a family of eggheads, so summer camp for me was usually something like Mini University. We’d play with metal shavings and magnets, or compete to design the most aerodynamic paper planes, but one of the things we also got to do was use the Olympic swimming pool with a full size, triple-decker […]

You really should have given up

Let go

I’m still thinking about willpower from my last article, and while it’s true that ‘stick-to-it-iveness’ (as my Grandma used to call it) is an important skill, it also really helps to know when to bail. Oddly, even though the desire to give up comes pretty naturally, deciding when you should actually do it doesn’t seem […]

Self-control and other things that
make it worse later

cupcake and puppy

Awhile back I had one of those moments where I read something that made all the kaleidoscope pieces shift slightly into a pattern that made more sense: part of our problem in trying to make the best, healthiest choice about everything is that self-control is a limited resource. If you’re constantly forcing yourself to behave […]

I had a bad day, but you’re a jerk

car puddle splash

We all know what we thought before we did that thing we really shouldn’t have done. We had a reason. Maybe it wasn’t a good reason, but unless we’re in an existentialist novel it wasn’t completely random and without motivation. Our understanding of why we do things is inextricably linked to what happened around us […]

Bright spot theory and the
science of the heart

My heart is like a toddler. It has very little concern for cause and effect and only a tenuous grasp on temporality. All sorts of things it really ought to know by now, it doesn’t appear to. I’ve had years to teach it better social behavior, but it’s basically still the kid jumping up and […]

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  • Of Note Elsewhere

    Mubi has a collection of film posters designed by Eva Švankmajerová, Surrealist painter, writer and filmmaker. Learn more about Eva Švankmajerová with an posthumous interview with Gwendolyn Albert, the translator of her novel, Baradla Cave.

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    At The Toast, Mo Moulton watches Downton Abbey and discusses its portrayal of Neville Chamberlain. “Here, then, is Neville Chamberlain in 1925. He is fulfilling the expectations set by an extraordinary political family. His father, Joseph Chamberlain, ran a screw factory in Birmingham, where he became passionate about urban improvement as a method for bettering the lives of his workers. As Liberal mayor of Birmingham, he was an early, passionate proponent of what became known as “gas and water socialism”: he wanted to put those services within reach of every resident by putting them under the management of local government. So far, it’s hard to imagine the Earl of Grantham having much in common with this energetic, egalitarian entrepreneur.”

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    In honor of Black History and Women In Horror Month, Graveyard Shift Sisters take a look at Audre’s Revenge Film collective, which was founded by Monika Estrella Negra:  “Audre’s Revenge Film was created in order to promote visibility of womyn, queer, trans and intersex folks of color in the sci fi and horror universe.

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    Please enjoy an hour of rare Bollywood synth funk (and an interview with DJ Fitz who put the mix together). (via @BethLovesBolly)

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    Nick Den Boer and Davy Force’s The Chickening is finally available to haunt your dreams forever. (The Gutter’s own Carol posted about The Chickening on the Toronto International Film Festival’s official Midnight Madness program blog here and here).

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    In Gareth Evans’ new short, “Pre Vis,” Hannah Al Rashid, Yayan Ruhian and Cecep Arif Rahman throw down.

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