The Cultural Gutter

geek chic with mad technique

"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars." -- Oscar Wilde

Long Jeanne Silver

Robin Bougie
Posted April 6, 2006

She's foot-free and fancy loose!A short list of the some of the most bizarre, more outlandish XXX fare of the 1970s wouldn’t be complete without mentioning an eye-opening 1977 Alex De Renzy feature film titled LONG JEANNE SILVER. In fact, of all the porn films in my collection, I’ve gone though the most trouble to get this particular one, so excuse me if I feel overly compelled to tell you its story.

The first time I ordered it from Something Weird Video, the vhs tape arrived blank for some unknown reason. Soon after that, I did some art for their catalogue and was paid in product. After I dropped off the order for which tapes I wanted in an envelope at the post office, I realised that I had totally forgotten to ask for a copy of Long Jeanne Silver (gasp!). I had to go back to the post office 20 minutes later to try and fix my error, but the woman at the counter gave me all kinds of shit about “rules,” and I had to argue with her to get my letter back!

Now that the order had been placed, I was confident that the infamous film would soon be mine, but what I didn’t take into account was Canada Customs opening up my mail and confiscating the tape on the grounds that it was “obscene” due to rules against fisting and foot-fucking that were in effect at that time. They sent me a letter explaining why the tape had been seized and destroyed, and in turn I contemplated moving to a new country just as I do anytime that Canada Customs steals perfectly legal to possess (but not transport) material out of my mail.

Undaunted, I decided that the postal service was totally risky, and arranged a trip with my friend Adam to drive down to Seattle where Something Weird is located, and pick up yet another box of tapes that were now owed me for doing more art for the company. I can still see us there, cold-sweating it at the US/Canada border as I had about 20 tapes hidden under the car seats, in our luggage, and stashed in various other cubby holes and bags in the car.

“How long were you out of the country?”
“Oh, haha. One day”
“Are you bringing anything back with you?”
“Oh um… no. Um. just some books or um, something. Just um, $20 worth.”
(long pause as he looks us up and down) “Drive on.”

After some outright smuggling, LONG JEANNE SILVER was mine, but as we drove back into Vancouver, I began to worry that the contents of the tape couldn’t possibly live up to the way I had built them up in my mind. Thankfully this far-out freak show lived up to my internal hype.

Long Jeanne is an average looking, average acting, blonde-haired young lass with an astonishing phallic birth defect that got her a starring role in this pseudo-documentary porn movie, the only such starring role of her career.

“My name is Long Jeanne Silver and I’m handicapped and horny!” she tells the audience while checking out her own centerspread in Cheri magazine. “Due to a quirk of nature I was born with a bigger dick than John Holmes, and baby, you better believe I know how to use it!”

Yep, Miss Silver was, thanks to a congenital birth defect, born without a foot — and she crams her big ol’ stump in every sticky orifice available on her various co-starring pals, including right up one young faggy gentleman’s poochhole!

According to exploitation film historian Johnny Legend, we’re damn lucky to even see this scene. It seems Mike Weldon (director of GETTING OFF, and SKIN TIGHT) had purchased the rights for the film from DeRenzy and couldn’t figure out why when he tried to resell it, every potential buyer was balking at the halfway point during the screenings. Legend himself was put in charge of editing out whatever it was that was scaring off potential customers.

“Silver picks up a gay guy, brings him home, and shoves her leg down his puckered ass.” Legend reviewed, as if recounting one of the most horrific moments of his life. “And she keeps going in, deeper and deeper. I even began to squirm. I ran into the booth, stopped the film, marked the footage number, then told the projectionist to let me know when the scene ended. I held my eyes shut until a tap on the shoulder told me it was over, then I marked the end numbers on the scene and galloped off to the editing room to hastily remove the offending sequence from all existing prints.” dab85.jpg

Jeanne’s stump is admittedly totally gross, and yet it’s heavily erotic at the same time. She waves the scrawny appendage around like a plucked chicken wing, and when she penetrates with her lubed monstrosity, you can’t quite believe your eyes — or if you’re faint of heart — you close them tight like Johnny did.

There really isn’t much attempt at a narrative in this little epic, just a series of sex sessions strung together (her 3-way with Tina Wong and Lori Blue being the one that my boner took the most notice of) and from various accounts the film was either a big success or it failed miserably in terms of box office. Jeanne herself didn’t much like the film in hindsight, telling an interviewer years later that she was “embarrassed by it”.

During an interview with Cheri magazine in 1977, young Jeanne admitted that she began prostituting her ass in reform school at the age of 15, where she had been placed due to seven counts of burglary. From there she plied her trade as a stripper in Phoenix, Arizona, then moved from town to town, hooking to pay her bills.

Jeanne was initially discovered by the Mitchell brothers in 1977 when she hopped in off the street and into their theater, short one leg and desperately ready to do any kind of hardcore scene they could think off. Pretty soon she was living in Carter “Sleazeball” Steven’s studio (aka “The Slut Motel”) in New York, and in all manner of XXX features, such as a freaky scene in the Avon roughie PRISONER OF PLEASURE, donning leather gear and cramming Carol Connors (Thora Birtch’s mom) in the puss in DESIRES FOR MEN, administering a spanking to Anna Turner in PEEPHOLES, getting fucked in the ass by Joey Silvera in 1983’s MANEATERS. She even appeared briefly with her fake leg attached in the 1977 enema-themed classic, WATERPOWER.

Long Jeanne also had some famous girlfriends, including a short relationship with classic porn star Sharon Mitchell (whom she met on the set of 1977’s THE VIOLATION OF CLAUDIA), and then an infamous run-in with new age porn princess Annie Sprinkle after the two were jailed together for participating in a stump-fucking photoshoot for Love Magazine. 48 hours later the charges were dropped, and Sprinkle speaks fondly of Jeanne’s “sexy stump” in her spoken word performances to this day.

I’ve heard accounts from various old schoolers that she was often seen doing live sex shows at the Melody Theater in NYC in the early ’80s, and that she continued doing them long after it was something you still saw around on a regular basis. Late in 1982, she had changed her performing name to Jean Silver, no longer showed off her plucked chicken wing while on camera, and in 1985 retired from adult cinema altogether.

The rumours are that Jeanne either moved to Arizona to live on a ranch, or went to college to study child psychology and got seriously involved in physical therapy programs — but neither of those have been confirmed outside of hearsay. Regardless, I hope she had a favorable outcome, she was one of a kind.

The movie is available on DVD from Alpha Blue Archives.

Comments

14 Responses to “Long Jeanne Silver”

  1. LJS
    May 11th, 2008 @ 3:45 pm

    First and foremost I must say that you have some facts wrong here. I will admit that I attempted Prostitution for about 1 hour and could not do it. At that time a man and his wife offered me a place to stay. Being a runaway at that time and only 16 years old I took the offer. From there I was introduced to Peter Wolff (R.I.P.) who was the editior of “Cheri” mag. At one point I even lived with him and his wife Patty on a strictly non sexual way. The Mitchell Brothers contacted me and offered me some work in SF.,I accepted but soon found out that I was way in over my head. What the hell does a 16 year old know about this shit?… Nothing!
    I ended up doing drugs like MDA and cocaine and then (mind you it’s a bit foggy) I somehow ended up working with Alex. I don’t remember much about doing this film as I was under the influence of some major drugs. I am not thrilled that I ever did this but I can’t change the past.
    I returned to NYC and did a few more films before returning to AZ (did I mention that I was AWOL from the SDC?) and cleared up my mess there.
    Upon doing so I returned to NYC, now of legal age.
    I must say Peter was floored when I finally showed him my birth certificate. I once again did a few more films and then started dancing instead.
    I worked in Canada, NYC, PA, KY, FLA, IN, MA, Minn, but never in AZ (you don’t shit where you live)
    I did quit around 1985 things were getting too crazy and I did not want to get caught in the AIDs issue (yes, I have been tested and I am free and clear) I started bartending and even managed a couple of bars in NYC and the UK.
    I finally returned home to AZ in the very late 80’s to give birth to my beautiful and brilliant child (who has just completed their first year of college and on the “Deans List”) I guess in a way I did become a “Child Phycologist”
    So there you have it! Take it or leave it!
    Believe it or not this is … was Long Jean Silver….

  2. Jack
    August 9th, 2009 @ 9:51 am

    LJS, thank you for generously giving us your story first hand. It really gave this story some punch.

  3. Dave
    January 12th, 2012 @ 12:34 am

    Jean,
    I love your response. You kept everything positive that you have done in your life. That is what keeps us going. I realize that you may never respond to this but oh well. Jack(the guy that posted the story) respects you and so do I. I love that you told your story. We all should. We all have skeletons in our closets. your closet just had the door open. And yes I saw the vids…. and yes… you are HOT!

  4. dave
    February 21st, 2012 @ 6:56 pm

    i dated jennie in the late 70s and have always loved her we met in oceanside ca if you want to talk to me my phone number is xxx-xxx-xxxx always dave

  5. Carol Borden
    February 22nd, 2012 @ 1:32 pm

    Hi, guys– Please don’t leave phone numbers in your comments. If you’re hoping to have an editor contact you, we have a link in the upper left sidebar, please click it and write us a note. If the subject of one of our articles is actually following our comments threads and interested in contacting you, they can always leave a comment in the thread and you guys can take it from there privately.

    Thanks.

  6. LJS
    June 29th, 2012 @ 3:56 pm

    Dave,
    Are you the one and the same?? How did we meet in Oceanside?
    Would be interested in reconnecting if it is really you!
    Hugs
    Jeanne

  7. LJS
    June 29th, 2012 @ 3:58 pm

    PS if you have Facebook look me up!

  8. hwoarang
    October 9th, 2013 @ 8:34 am

    I would like to have contact with long jeanne silver … if he answers it would be great so we could talk a little on facebook

  9. hwoarang
    October 9th, 2013 @ 8:59 am

    so if I get a reply I know you well and forge a friendship on facebook
    :)

  10. Carol Borden
    October 9th, 2013 @ 1:37 pm

    Hi– I didn’t publish your email just so you wouldn’t be spammed.If Long Jeanne Silver sees your comment and replies, you two can work out contact from there. Thanks for commenting!

  11. hwoarang
    October 10th, 2013 @ 11:14 am

    ok.. è giusto però sta di fatto una cosa.. se silver vede il mio commento e metti caso lei vuole contattarmi come potrà mai farlo? visto che la mia e mail non può essere visualizzata?

  12. hwoarang
    October 10th, 2013 @ 11:17 am

    ok .. is right but the fact is one thing .. If silver sees my comment and let’s assume you want to contact me how will you ever do that? since my e-mail can not be displayed?
    I’m sorry I’m Italian and I have a habit not to translate …

  13. Carol Borden
    October 10th, 2013 @ 1:40 pm

    Hi again, Hwoarang–

    We have your email from when you registered to comment. If she sees your comment and wants to talk to you, I can send it to her. If she comments here, she can also suggest talking to her on facebook or Twitter and ask for your facebook or Twitter name at that time.

    I’m sorry that I don’t speak Italian. Thanks for translating :)

  14. hwoarang
    November 15th, 2013 @ 5:30 am

    a curiosity but in the long jeanne silver film where you can see our diva who buggered that actor gay, squirming when she went into depth? and what the name of that guy? not that I care so much about adult film database but does not mention his name even strange …

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